Snowbound with my girls!!

Once upon a time, twenty-eight years ago, I was a Junior at the University of Tennessee, and my boyfriend at the time introduced me to two girls, CH and CR. They're going to kill me for posting this lovely 80's photo of them, but unfortunately, this is how we ALL looked back then!

He thought we would get along, and that it would be fun to double date with their boyfriends, who were HIS friends. Today, boyfriend is long gone, but the friendship I have with those girls has blossomed into a beautiful relationship that continues to multiply and enrich my life. Not only are they like my extended family, but as the years have gone by, the seeds of that friendship have produced many more friends...brought into the circle at different times, but are as deep rooted as the original three. Some have come and gone...but there is a core group that is closer now than ever before.

Through the years we have taken many trips together, celebrated countless birthdays, (especially the milestone 30 and 40th!),


been bridesmaids in each other's weddings,

planned wedding and baby showers,

attended funerals, prayed and held hands through chemotherapy, and we treasure each other like rare diamonds. We don't see each other nearly as often as we did before families, jobs, and life stepped in, but we do carve out a few times a year to get together for birthdays, graduations or whatever reason we can think of for a girl's night out. But we also try to take a trip once or twice a year.

Trips are difficult to plan...everyone has such varied commitments. Our children are all different ages, so they're at different stages in their lives, and have their own busy schedules, our spouses have to be open to stepping in while we're gone, and our jobs and volunteer commitments have to have openings, and all this has to happen on the same weekend. Luckily, for the last almost 30 years, we have been able carve out a long weekend for some much needed bonding, silliness and girl-talk. CR has a house in Sandestin, so for several years we've gone down there for the beach, but for the last 2 1/2 years I've talked them into coming to North Carolina, my version of heaven. The first trip, only five of us made the long, 6 hour drive. But after seeing the photos, last year we had seven. It was off-season, so there was no boating, no fishing, no golf, no swimming, but we had an incredible weekend. With a little excitement at the end.






This year, we had ten girls. I warned everyone that we had three bedrooms, so some people would have to sleep on the floor. In our 20's, that wasn't a big deal. Heck, spring break in Ft. Lauderdale we had 12 girls in one hotel room! We're a little creakier now that we're nearing the big 5-0, but no one minded. We had a lottery for bed space, and no one complained about having to sleep on the pull-out sofa. (Well, not much, anyway).

Again, it was off-season, there was one restaurant open in the area, so we brought groceries and made chili, vegetable soup, and chicken tortilla soup and just hibernated in the house, other than a couple of breathtaking hikes.

We knew snow had been forecast. But we're from Nashville, where they predict 7 inches and get 1/2 inch, and they still close schools. Plus, the temps had been in the 50's even Friday morning, the day the snow started. We had driven to Gorges State Park to hike the Rainbow Falls trail...a 3 mile round trip to a breathtaking waterfall. The trailhead is deep within the park, and we were the only cars there. We made it to the falls, many photo opps along the way, and about 1/2 mile before we were out of the trail, the snow began to fall.

Almost immediately it was pouring snow. It was a very wet snow. Almost rain-like. We weren't worried. The temps had been so warm surely the roads were fine. So we piled into the two cars...one a four wheel drive, and one was CR's big suburban-like truck with rear wheel drive. The snow was coming down so fast the road out looked confusing. We took a wrong turn. Then on the undulating hills, our tires started spinning. We all got really quiet. CR's jaw got tight, her hands squeezing the steering wheel so hard they turned pale white. KE started praying, and the four wheel drive vehicle slid off the road. Somehow, we made it out of the park. The main roads were clearer, because they had been brined the day before. But we left CR's car at the convenience store where we had parked our other two 4 wheel drives. We barely made it back to the house. We decided to leave one car at the bottom of the street (my house is on a huge hill), and shuttle everyone up to the house. I drove the first group up, dropped them off, then as I went back down to pick up the others, my car slide all the way down. So we parked them both at the bottom. In retrospect, that's probably why we were able to get home on Sunday.



The snowstorm kept us inside, and our planned evening at the Brown Trout for dinner never happened, but it was probably one of our best trips ever. We watched movies, played games, drank really good wine, and hiked in the most beautiful winter wonderland I have ever seen in my life.

Our friends from Cashiers drove in to see us on Saturday night and got snowed in, so we did have people who slept on the floor, but it was an incredible weekend. It was not without drama...you can't get 12 girls together in close quarters without having some drama, but it was all good.

I am so blessed to have these friends in my life. I know that finding close friends as an adult is not easy. Life changes such as having babies, starting new jobs, getting married, moving, etc. make it difficult to make new ties, or fray those we already have. This group of women has done all those things, and through them, we have continued to make our friendship something that is important to us. We're fortunate that our spouses support our friendship. I could write another post about how my dear husband has come to appreciate my bonds with these girls, when at first, he was a little threatened by them. I know we will have many more life changes in the years to come, but I hope that we will always have this connection, and that we will always find time to get together to re-charge.

Basketball Thoughts

As I walked into the gym tonight for H's basketball game, I just had to smile. The echo of bouncing balls, the smell of popcorn from the concession stand, the music blaring for the pre-game warm-up...I love it! Of all the sports and activities my daughter has participated in through the years, soccer, softball, track, cross-country, tennis, basketball, dance, theatre-basketball is my favorite. I love the physicality of basketball; the speed, the strength, the coordination, the teamwork, and the game. Watching H play basketball through the years is one of my favorite things to do.

She started playing in First Grade. I remember the coach of her little WNSL team sat the parents down at the beginning of the season and said, "These girls might be our future high school basketball team!" That was a stretch I must say. We were lucky if those girls made a basket, much less a basket in our own goal. Half the time they went the wrong direction. Dribbling didn't exist for them back then. There were 20 girls on the team that year. As the years went by, more and more girls dropped out, and by the time they were in high school there were four left. But through the years, for H, basketball was the one sport she stuck with. One by one the other activities and sports were dropped to make room for the time commitment of basketball.

H transferred to a new school in High School, so she started all over with a new group of girls. It was a great way to transition to a new school. She had four seniors who were great role models and took her under their wings which made the change much easier. She became very close with most of the team, and even wrote a blog post about her new family.

"My Second Family
Being a part of the Basketball team at school is possibly one of the best experiences I've ever had. I did not only improve as a player, but I also made a second family. 17 sisters and 3 moms to be exact. The girls on my team were not only so sweet to me when I was new to the team, but immediately included me in everything. I never felt left out because I was the newbie. I have found that I've made a personal bond with each of the players in a different way. They are all incredible athletes and incredible people too. It wasn't hard to swoop in and be a part of the team since we are almost ALWAYS together. Literally, I've spent around 315 hours with them this year. This does not include nights and weekends or trips that we take or the summer team camps or tryouts, but just practices. We have only a few more weeks in the season, and though I may have some more free time after school, I will really miss all of my sisters."

It was all good.

This year has been a little bit different. The seniors who were mentors for H have graduated and moved on, and she's struggling with the academic pressures of 10th grade, and the time commitment of basketball. Unless you play a fall or spring sport, basketball is a year round commitment. Weight room, private coaching, AAU, and the team practices and games pretty much take up all H's time. Dance, theatre, rock climbing, volunteering are all things she wants to do but has no time.

J complains about the long weekends we don't get to take because of basketball games, the tournaments over the holidays, and the long hours away from us because of school and practices, but regardless, we love watching her play. And as I walked into the gym tonight, and I had that familiar happy feeling, I wonder if the reason H has played basketball all these years, more and more exclusively, was because she always wants to please us. Did she continue to play because we were so excited about her playing? Did she give up soccer, tennis, dancing, and track because we complained about the practices and games more for those activities than basketball? As parents, do we subconsciously lead our kids into the activities we wanted to do when we were young?

As far as the future goes, time will tell. I don't think H regrets the years she spent playing basketball. She learned a lot about herself, her limits, her abilities, and her strengths. Whether she thinks it was all worth it, that remains to be seen. We will support her 100% no matter what she decides. But for now, we are going to enjoy every minute of every game.

Easy Homemade Meatballs and Spaghetti!

I love cookbooks. I read them like novels. Even the recipes that I would never make...too complicated, or with ingredients that no one in my family eats. It's like a treasure hunt....every once in awhile I find a great recipe. But I must admit, having my laptop in the kitchen has reduced the time I used to spend perusing the books. I can do a search and find an infinite number of interesting recipes. Some I make once, and although they were good, I don't make them again. Usually because it wrecks the kitchen, takes too many pots and pans, or exotic ingredients that I don't keep on hand.

But today I needed to make something to take to a couple from church who just had a baby. When I cook for people from church I usually try to make something that can be reheated or frozen, and also that I can make extra for my family. I found a recipe that I think will be a keeper. Homemade meatballs are usually so messy...you have to mix them, shape them, bake them, and then you also have to make a sauce. These were so easy, and because they simmer in the same pan as the sauce, they make jarred sauce taste homemade. You could use homemade sauce if you wanted, but I put these together in about 15 minutes before lunch, and let them simmer for a couple of hours while I cleaned up the kitchen. Boil up some spaghetti, and voila, delicious spaghetti and meatballs with almost no mess! This recipe made enough for my family, the family from church, and I had enough left over to freeze for another day. You could halve the recipe if you don't need as much.




EASY SPAGHETTI AND MEATBALLS

2 28 oz. jars spaghetti sauce
2 28 oz. cans diced tomatoes with basil and garlic
2 lbs. extra lean ground beef (I used 97% lean)
2 eggs
3/4 cup dry breadcrumbs
1/4 cup fresh parsley, chopped
1 clove minced garlic
1/2-1 teaspoon salt
1/4 cup parmesan cheese

2 boxes of spaghetti, cooked al dente

1. Place sauce and tomatoes in large saucepan and simmer over medium heat.
2. In large bowl mix beef, eggs, crumbs, parsley, garlic, salt and parmesan.
3. Mix together with hands, and shape into meatballs. (I made about 1.5 " thick meatballs and it made about 36).
4. Place meatballs in simmering sauce.



5. When sauce returns to a simmer, cover and cook 45 minutes to an hour until cooked through. I simmered the sauce and meatballs for about 2 1/2 hours to make sure they were completely cooked.
6. Serve sauce and meatballs over warm spaghetti.

They were a huge hit with J, and the kitchen still smells incredible after the sauce simmered all afternoon!

The search for easy Vegetarian Lettuce Wraps

Almost a year ago, my daughter decided to become a vegetarian. While I respected the motivation behind her decision, I was a little bit worried about how I was going to feed my family. We had finally gotten to a place where I could make ONE dinner and everyone would eat it. But my husband does not think it's a meal unless some form of meat is present. Fortunately, H will eat fish, but unfortunately, Jeff only ate swordfish, shrimp and lobster. Oh, and fried catfish at Sportsman's Grille. Fast forward a year, H is still a pesca-vegetarian (eating only fish), J has added Trout, Tuna, Scallops and Halibut to his list of edible seafood, and I've found the best places to buy seafood in Nashville (not an easy task since we're 8 hours from the nearest ocean).

But I can't serve fish every night. Sometimes I have to make vegetarian chili (added meat to J's), vegetarian pasta, and I am learning how to prepare tofu. The only experience we have had eating Tofu was the vegetarian lettuce wraps at PF Changs. And to be honest, it's hard to tell the difference between their tofu wraps and the chicken wraps. I found a recipe online for the PF Chang's version, but both times I made them the tofu just tasted blah...and the texture wasn't the same. Plus, after mixing together the marinade, the cooking sauce, and the dipping sauce, and chopping up the vegetables and tofu, my kitchen looked like Haiti probably looks this morning. (Small pause for a prayer for those victims).

So I have been experimenting with the recipe, and last night I made a much better, easier version of the above recipe. I think the key is how to prepare the tofu before stir-frying. I start with a block of firm tofu, drained, and put it on a stack of 5 or 6 paper towels. Then I top it with another few paper towels and put something heavy on top (a heavy pan, a plate with a teapot full of water, etc.) After about 20 minutes, I turn the tofu over, replace with a couple more paper towels (I know, bad for the environment), and repeat the process for another 10-15 minutes. Then I thinly dice it, put it on a roasting pan sprayed with cooking spray, and bake at 350 for 20-30 minutes, stirring halfway through. THEN, I marinate it. When tofu is warm, it supposedly takes the marinade flavors better. When I put the recipe together about 30 minutes before dinner, the tofu got really nice and chewy and very flavorful.

So here's the recipe:

Vegetarian Lettuce Wraps

Marinade:
4 Tbsp. Soy sauce (low sodium)
2 Tbsp. Rice Wine
1 TBsp. Rice Vinegar
2 Tbsp. Brown Sugar
1 tsp finely chopped ginger
1 Tbsp. lime juice

Mix above together and cover prepared tofu for 1-2 hours, or longer before stir frying.

Filling:
1 block firm or extra firm tofu
1 onion, finely chopped
1-2 cloves chopped garlic
1 small can water chestnuts, finely chopped
1/2 bag broccoli slaw mixture
2 Tbsp. canola, sesame or peanut oil
1/4 cup of Iron Chef Honey Garlic stir fry and marinade sauce (or similar bottled sauce)
Iceberg, Boston Bibb or Butter Lettuce Leaves

Heat oil in wok over medium heat, add drained, marinated tofu and stir fry 15-20 minutes, stirring gently until browned. You can see below how the tofu "pops" as it browns.



Remove from pan, and add remaining ingredients. Stir fry for 5 minutes until veggies begin to soften. Add a little bit of reserved marinade to deglaze if needed. Stir fry for a few more minutes as veggies continue to soften, then add stir fry sauce. Stir until veggies are done and sauce is warm. Add tofu and stir. Serve with Iceberg, Boston Bibb or Butter Lettuce leaves.

Dipping Sauce:
Lettuce Wrap Dipping Sauce
1/4 cup soy sauce
1/8 cup seasoned rice vinegar
1 tablespoon fresh minced ginger
2 tablespoons chopped green onions

Combine all ingredients and serve with lettuce wraps.

The Winter Formal

I'm at a loss on how to start a post after two months of no writing...do I give excuses about how busy I've been, a synopsis of what I've been up to, or just ignore it and jump right in? Hmmmmm...I think I'll just jump right in.

January in our house is a much calmer month than any other month of the year. Yes, school has started back, and yes, basketball season is in full force (2-3 games per week, which means 4-6 games of JV and Varsity), but H's school has three weeks of "winterim", which means no regular classes or homework. The 11th and 12th graders have three week internships off campus (sometimes overseas), and the 9th and 10th graders stay on campus and sign up for special interest classes. H is taking "Music from the 60's", "Designing Women going Green" (green architecture), and "Extra Extra Read all about it" (writing the winterim version of their school newspaper). What a difference this makes! She has very little homework, a couple of quizzes, and she is taking classes of her choosing that she is genuinely interested in.

The biggest dilemma we have this month is Winter Formal...her all girl's school has a winter dance at the beginning of February, and they have to come up with "dates". Not a problem if you're "going out" with someone, but most of her friends and classmates don't have a special someone to invite. So the scrambling begins in December to ask someone who...

• 1. Won't get the wrong idea (i.e. think it means more than it does)
• 2. Will be fun to have along with their friends (not too shy),
• 3. Won't be too clingy, (so they can talk to their girlfriends),
• 4. Will look good in pictures (hopefully tall enough so they can wear heels),
• 5. Will say "yes" (it's awful if you ask someone who says "no")
• 6. Isn't already on someone else's 'list' (another classmate wanted to ask him and gets mad that you did first)
• 7. Isn't someone's "ex" (even though they're not together anymore she has permanent 'dibs')

After many, many text messages to her friends, she decided on the perfect boy to ask. He fit all the prerequisites (especially #2 and #4), although #7 was a little questionable, but the "ex" is the one who introduced them, so she asked, he said he'd be happy to go and it's on.


The next hurdle is THE GROUP. The actual dance is two hours long, so you have dinner before and after-parties afterward. So they divide up in smaller groups to get together beforehand for pictures, then dinner, then the dance, then the after-party. Finding the right "group" is crucial. You want to be with your girlfriends, but if their dates don't know each other, it's very awkward. And there's always the group that just seems to keep getting bigger, so they have to limit the size, and invariably someone gets left out. It's a situation just fraught with drama. She has a little less than four weeks until the dance...no group plans are definite...so I'm sure there will be more to the story. Until then...