Middle School Dances and "Grinding"

"Grinding" is the new term for the dance style that seems to be everywhere these days. Well, I really don't know how new it is, but I've just recently become aware of it. H is extremely uncomfortable with the whole thing. Last year, the "bar/bat mitzvah" year at her school, when they had dance parties at least a couple of times a month, she started seeing a few kids doing it. At the time, most of her close friends didn't "grind", so she had people to hang with when the group started. J and I were at one of the parties, standing next to the dance floor talking with some other parents when he looked up and saw a couple of kids (who we've known since preschool) basically simulating sex...right in front of him! The shock on his face must have radiated towards them, because not long after, they both looked over, immediately stopped, smoothed their clothes and walked away in opposite directions. A few minutes later they sent H over to tell us that we were making her friends uncomfortable. The whole situation began to give H a lot of emotional distress, so I looked up "grinding" on Urban Dictionary. I can't even repeat the descriptions I found there. Now that she's in 8th grade, it's becoming even more status quo. More and more of her girlfriends are starting to join in the big huddle/group. It's getting to be so that she doesn't even enjoy the parties. She worked really hard on the 7th/8th grade party at her school this weekend, and had a good time until the end, when one of her best friends left her to go join in the grinding. Some of the parents who came at the end of the party to pick up their kids saw it and have complained, calling and emailing the school, so it will hopefully be addressed. A Chicago Tribune Article describes how some schools have canceled their school dances because of it.

It's interesting, but even though a majority of her class participates in this kind of dancing, the kids who don't are kind of banding together. I'm proud of her for taking a stand. It's like the movie "dirty dancing". I think middle school is way too early for this kind of behavior, but they've been exposed to so much more at such an early age. I really don't want to be a prude about this, but how can we teach our kids about appropriate sexual behavior when this is so commonplace and accepted? It's one thing to do it in High School or college, but 7th and 8th grade?

French phrases for travelers...#3

Here are three phrases we have to use at least once or twice a day while in paris...

"Une table pour trois, s’il vous plait"...
A table for three, please.


And this one goes without saying:

"je ne comprends pas"
I don't understand...

Followed by:

"Pouvez-vous repeter cela, s'il vous plait?"
Could you repeat that please????

How to Watercolor website

Found a great website with information on watercolor techniques.

It shows step by step processess in painting different things, as well as great lessons for all kinds of techniques. There are links to tons of artists all over the world, as well as information on great masters and how they used watercolor. Some days I get so frustrated with the medium, because I can't get it to do what I want it to do, and then I see what others have been able to do with it. It's remarkable. And there are also so many different styles. I haven't seen anyone with my particular style... just paint and paint and paint until you find some semblance of a picture. I wish I could be lighter with the brush. I guess it's just a never ending process of learning.

Here's my latest:

Linguine with Sun-dried Tomatoes and Chicken Sausage

I made this pasta last night with whatever ingredients we had in the kitchen, and J said it was the best I'd ever made, so I think I should write it down in case I need to duplicate it someday.

Here it is:

Linguine with Sun-dried Tomatoes and Chicken Sausage

1/2 cup sun dried tomatoes packed in oil
2 Italian-style precooked chicken sausage links (can use more if you desire)
1 large sweet onion, diced
4 cloves garlic, chopped
2 Tbsp Gourmet Garden Italian Seasoning blend (in tube, like fresh...can use 2 tsp. dried)
salt and pepper to taste

1/2 lb. linguine (I used spinach)

Fill pasta pot with water and put on to boil. While water is boiling, chop onions and garlic. Heat large skillet over medium high, add sun dried tomatoes. Since they're packed in oil, that's all you need to saute the onions and garlic. Turn heat down while sauteing, so the tomatoes don't burn. Cook, stirring with wooden spoon, until onions are translucent and a little crispy on edges. While they're cooking, cut sausages in half, then 1/4 inch slices. Add to vegetables and continue to cook until sausage is heated through (J. likes them browned). Add seasoning blend, and salt and pepper. Cover and reduce to simmer. When pasta is cooked, don't rinse, just add to vegetable/chicken mix with 1/2 ladle of pasta water, and toss. Add shredded parmesan cheese, if desired.

Je voudrais allez a` Paris!

When I was a little girl I read the Madeline books..."In an old house in Paris that was covered with vines lived 12 little girls in two straight lines..."It was pure poetry! From that moment I was smitten, and dreamed of going to Paris. I was 30 years old before I actually made it there, and my high school French was like a phantom memory but I remembered enough to at least attempt to speak French (unlike rude Americans who expect everyone in Paris to speak English). What I found was a delightful city-full of beautiful architecture, beautiful people, beautiful parks, beautiful history and beautiful shopping. Did I mention it was beautiful? We've been back three times, and each time the experience becomes even more incredible.

The second visit we were able to have a private tour of Versailles, dinner in the 380-foot-long Hall of Battles, with its 33 huge paintings recording French military victories from the Battle of Tolbiac in 496 to the Battle of Wagram in 1809. Then the Paris Boy's choir sang...still gives me goosebumps. Our 3rd visit, when we took H since she didn't get to go the first time, wasn't as great. Crowds, crowds, everywhere, the gardens were dead, and the hall of battles locked up, but it was still incredible...to be standing in such an historical place. We love it!

We were also fortunate that the last two visits were at the end of July, because the "soldes", or "sales" are city-wide and incredible. Especially since the dollar means much less over there, it brings the prices to a more reasonable point. So I'm thrilled to say we just made a reservation to go back this July!!!! We're going there for a few days before we head to Barcelona, so in addition to brushing up on our French, we need to learn a bit of Spanish, I guess. How embarrassing that we only speak one language.

I'm going to learn as many phrases as possible to help us communicate with the gentile francais, and this is the first one that always helps.

Ju suis desole' (I wonder if french keyboards let you put the accent in the proper place?), parlez-vous Anglais? Means "I'm sorry, do you speak English?"

9 out of 10 times we get a very gracious and helpful response.

Also, check out this blog...it's a 20-something Scottish girl living in Paris, in love with a young french man. She makes me remember my 20's fondly...so much emotion and love, and passion for life!

Too much Photoshop...not a good thing!

Do you think the people who put this photo on the cover think that it's fooling anyone?



I mean, I know they photoshop blemishes, cellulite, maybe even stretch the models so they appear taller and thinner, but this is ridiculous! Drew Barrymore is a beautiful woman. Check it out on one of my favorite blogs: Backinskinnyjeans

Diet Coke is 99% Water? Cool!

I am not proud of this...

I drink at least 6 diet cokes a day. Sometimes more. I'm a certified personal trainer...I know better, but now that I'm not working as a trainer, I do it anyway.

I also exercise a lot. 1-2 hours a day, and more when it's warm and I'm cycling. I keep thinking I should drink more water, that I'm probably perpetually dehydrated, but there is nothing better than a really cold diet coke (I try to put it in the freezer for a few minutes before I drink it). Not diet pepsi, not diet iced tea or lemonade, it has to be DIET COKE--in a can is the best.

Soooo....99% water? At least I know I'm getting my fluids...

I wonder if I get any benefit from them before I pee them all out?

Teenage volunteer

I'm all for volunteering. When I worked full time I dreamed of being able to work non-gratis for a cause I believed in. After H was born I became a volunteer mad-woman. I cooked for sick people at church, licked envelopes, cleaned up after tornadoes, helped build homes for habitat, served on the board of a couple of charities near and dear to my heart, and set up camp at H's school. So when she becomes involved in something at school I am 100% supportive.

She's on the social committee for the 7th/8th grade party.

Today she came home today and told me she volunteered to bring 15 cases of soda.

I'm so proud.

EASY BREAKFAST CINNAMON ROLLS

We’re in the mountains. Rained all day long, cold and foggy, so no view, no hiking, but it has been the perfect day! Slept late, went for a run in the rain, watched cable moves (World according to Garp, Risky Business, Man of the Year), played Skip-Bo, Monopoly, and grilled a couple of huge tenderloin steaks, and roasted butternut squash, potatoes and onions. I’m so relaxed there’s no word to really describe it!

The only negative is this is the off, off season, so the coffee shop with homemade muffins is closed. Bummer. We packed no breakfast food, so this morning I looked at the pantry to figure out what we could have for breakfast. We did have a box of bisquick, sugar, cinnamon, craisons, and skim milk. So I remembered a recipe for cinnamon rolls with bisquick. They were pretty easy to mix up and were perfect! I didn’t have confectioner’s sugar for the glaze, but I put granulated sugar in the blender with 1 tsp. of cornstarch, and voila…powdered sugar! Here’s the recipe:



Glazed Cinnamon Rolls

2 TBSP granulated sugar

1 tsp ground cinnamon

2 ½ cups original Bisquick mix

2/3 cup milk

2 TBSP granulated sugar

2 TBSP butter or margarine (I didn’t have butter, but used butter flavored PAM)

¼ cup raisins (no raisins, but substituted craisins…dried cranberries)



1. Heat oven to 375 degrees. Grease bottom and sides of 13x9inch pan. In small bowl, mix 2 TBSP sugar and cinnamon, set aside.

2. In medium bowl, stir bisquick mix, milk, and 2 TBSP sugar until dough forms. If dough is too sticky, gradually mix in enough bisquick (up to ¼ cup) to make dough easy to handle. Turn dough onto surface well dusted with bisquick mix,; gently roll dough in bisquick mix to coat. Shape into ball; knead 10 times.

3. Roll dough into 15x9 inch rectangle; spread with butter (or spray with butter flavored PAM). Sprinkle evenly with sugar mixture and raisins (or craisins). Roll up tightly; beginning at 15 inch side. Seal well by pinching edge of dough into roll. Cut into 1 ¼ inch slices, place cut sides down in pan.

4. Bake 23-25 minutes or until golden brown. Cool 5 minutes. Remove from pan.

5. In medium bowl, mix powdered sugar and 2 TBSP milk until smooth. Spread glaze over warm rolls.

Valentine's Day disappointment

H was so excited about Valentine's day; like me, she loves the thought of telling people how much they mean to you, or just that you're thinking of them, and chocolate! We've always made a big deal about it at our house.

So, a couple of weeks ago one of the high school classes did a fundraiser for the prom or something...sent a note to the 8th graders and I assume the high schoolers, that they were selling carnations. For $5, you could get 3 carnations and they'd be delivered to the locker of any student you wanted. She was so excited and quickly picked out 4 or 5 of her best friends that she wanted to send flowers to. She sat down to fill out the form, and I mentioned that I hated this kind of thing.

She said, "why?"

"Because there will always be someone who won't get flowers, and they'll feel left out."

Well, of course, she couldn't bear the thought of that. So she made a list of 40 or so of her classmates that she thought might not get flowers, and $70 later, made a list to send those classmates "anonymous" carnations.

When I picked her up at school today, she was bubbling with excitement about how much those kids appreciated the flowers. One girl carried hers around with her all day long. Someone had found out H sent them, though, even though it was supposed to be anonymous. But she still felt good about it.

Later on, after homework and shower, when she is always exhausted and emotional, she looked at me and burst into tears. When I asked her what was wrong, she said, "No one sent me any flowers!"

One of those hard lessons about the joy of giving without getting anything in return.

Switching to iphone...

After the love/hate relationship we've had with our Treos for the last couple of years, J and I switched over to the iphone today. I've spent the better part of 7 hours, just setting them up. Mine was relatively easy, because I have a mac, and already synced all my palm contact info into i cal and address book, so it pretty much set itself up.

Then I had to do J's. I thought it would be a piece of cake. Just export his contacts into a csv file and import into the itunes on his computer. Nope. So I tried syncing his stuff into my palm software on the mac. But I didn't know how to import his stuff separately from mine, so now all our contacts and calendar stuff is combined. But that didn't work, because I didn't want to sync his iphone on my itunes, anyway. So I spent about three hours after dinner trying to get his stuff onto Outlook on his windows computer. Boring, so I won't go there. Looooong story short, finally got his info onto Outlook and it's been syncing with the iphone for a very long time. I don't think it's going to work.

Now I just realized I can't delete more than one email at a time on the iphone. I get about 200 per day! There's got to be a way...

Cool Mom's Care-Helping Children develop self-confidence

A few weeks ago a friend turned me onto this cool website...COOL People Care. You can sign up for daily emails for that site as well as "Cool Mom's Care". Every day you get a very short snippet of a way to make the world a little better. I loved today's:

Week of Love: Love Our Selves

Self love is key in our children’s development of healthy self-confidence. Kissing and hugging them more helps them feel loved, but it’s also important to make sure they learn about loving themselves. The way we talk about ourselves in front of our kids determines how they’ll reference themselves. Instead of saying, “I am such an idiot,” try talking about positive solutions to a mistake you made. Our negative self-perceptions will project onto our children. They are just learning about life and the more positive language we teach them the more confidence they will have in using it.

Girls in sports...benefits in the workplace

I read a very interesting article about the benefits of sports participation for girls and women. Why Sports Participation for Girls and Women

Research shows that between ages 6-9, boys and girls are equally interested in sports participation, but by the age of 14, girls drop out of sport at a rate SIX times greater than boys. Even though our daughters are not as likely to be discouraged from playing sports as they were 10 years ago (thanks to Title IX), they aren't encouraged to the same extent as little boys. We need to encourage our daughters' sports participation, so they can derive the psychological physiological and sociological benefits of sports participation that boys and men have received for years.

We've all heard about the benefits for girls involved in sports:

*they're less likely to have unwanted pregnancy
*more likely to get better grades in school
*higher levels of confidence, self esteem, and lower levels of depression
*more positive body image and higher states of psychological well-being

and yadda yadda yadda...

But, the interesting thing in this article is the fact that women entering the workforce, who don't know the written and unwritten rules of sport are at a disadvantage in understanding business models of organization.

For example:

1. Teams are chosen based on people's strengths and competencies rather than popularity
2. Successful players are skilled in practicing the illusion of confidence
3. Errors are expected of people trying to do new things. Just don't make the same mistake twice
4. Loyalty to teammates is very important
5. "I will" equals "I can"
6. In a hierarchical organization, your boss (coach) gives the orders and the employees (players) follow the instructions.

Sport is where boys have traditionally learned about teamwork, goal-setting, pursuit of excellence in performance and other achievement-oriented behaviors--critical skills necessary for success in the workplace. It's no accident that 80% of female executives at Fortune 500 companies identified themselves as former "tomboys"-having played sports.

Which Presidential Candidate would you pick?

Very interesting...take this quiz to see which candidate matches up to your preferences:

Presidential Candidate Quiz

Before I was a mom...

I can't take credit for the following...it came from someone else, but the part about feeling your heart outside your body...I've never heard it expressed that way before...

Before I was a Mom -
didn’t know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.
I didn’t know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.
I didn’t know that bond between a mother and her child.
I didn’t know that something so small could make me feel so important and happy.
Before I was a Mom -
I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn’t want to put her down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn’t stop the hurt.
I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much.
I never knew that I could love someone so much.

I never knew how much my mom loved me, until I was a mom myself.

H is 14 1/2 years old, going on 21, but I still feel the wonder and awe of being her mom.

Hummus with Sun-Dried Tomatoes...awesome!!!

Oh my God!!! I try new recipes all the time, and most of the time they don't taste nearly as good as they sound, but this recipe for Hummus with Sundried tomatoes was so good I almost ate it all by the spoonful. I'll serve it to friends tomorrow, if it lasts until then...

SUN DRIED TOMATO HUMMUS

1 cup dried chickpeas (garbanzo beans)
1 cup sun-dried tomatoes (not in oil)
salt and pepper
2 cloves garlic, more to taste
1/4 cup extra virgin olive oil
1 Tablespoon pimenton, (spanish paprika), more to taste, optional
lemon juice to taste
Pita chips or raw vegetables, for serving

If time allows, soak chickpeas in water to cover overnight, if not, boil in water to cover for 2 minutes, then soak for 2 hours.

In a pot, combine chickpeas and tomatoes in water to cover and simmer, partially covered, until chickpeas are very tender, adding water if necessary. Drain, reserving a little cooking liquid.

Combine in a food processor with salt, pepper, garlic, oil, pimenton if using and reserved cooking liquid as necessary to get machine going. Puree, then add lemon juice to taste, along with more oil, pimenton or salt if desired. Serve with pita chips or raw vegetables. (This will keep, refrigerated, for about a week).

Roasted Butternut Squash...YUM!

J was out of town earlier this week so H and I had our favorite dinner. It's not really a recipe, per se, but anytime we serve these everyone wants to know how to make it so I thought I'd post it. When I was growing up in the south, we only had vegetables slow cooked with butter or bacon fat, or fried, so this whole concept of roasting fresh vegetables is new to me. I think using this method you can roast anything and it tastes good. We usually do butternut squash, onions, asparagus, and ,maybe potatoes or sweet potatoes. I've done it with carrots, sweet peppers, green beans, and just about any vegetable in the pantry. I use a convection oven so that I can roast multiple pans (they shrink up when cooking, but take up a lot of space at first). If you don't have a convection oven you can just put in multiple pans and rotate them periodically. When I set my oven to 425 degrees in the convection mode it actually cooks at 400 degrees, so adjust accordingly.

Also, the butternut squash, potatoes, and carrots take the longest time so I put them in the oven first, then cut up the rest and put them in a few minutes later.

H and I aren't really vegetarians, but this is a wonderful, filling, healthy meal.

Roasted Vegetables

*Any variety of vegetables, but the following are my favorites:

Butternut Squash
Sweet onions
Asparagus
Potatoes
Carrots
Sweet Peppers (Red, Green or Yellow)
Sweet Potatoes
Olive oil
dried basil
kosher salt

Wash, peel (if necessary), and cut into 1" chunks the squash, onions, potatoes or sweet potatoes. Trim root end of asparagus, and cut carrots and peppers into thick strips.

(Butternut squash is very labor intensive to peel. The easiest way I've found is to use very sharp chef's knife and cut ends off, then cut bottom (seed end) off and peel that, scoop out the seeds, then peel the long end and slice and cut into chunks. Some people just cut in half and cook, but I like exposing the cut ends while roasting to give it a little crispness)

Place vegetables in large bowl and sprinkle with a couple tablespoons of olive oil. Use hands to toss with the oil so it's distributed evenly. You don't have to use much. Spray large roasting pans (I use those large flat pans with about 1/2-1" sides) with cooking spray to prevent sticking. Spread vegetables so that they're separated, sprinkle with kosher salt and a little dried basil. Roast in convection oven set at 425 degrees for about 40 minutes or until cooked and a little crispy on the edges.
The different veggies cook at different speeds. The onions and asparagus cook pretty quickly, should only take 20 minutes or so. Squash and potatoes take the longest. Roasting brings out the sweetness and the kosher salt just makes it delicious!

Credit cards are BAD!!!

This is too funny! I bet there are lots of adults who act much worse when they find out they should give up their credit cards. Way to go, dad!

Super Bowl...is it just all about the party?

Sure, it was exciting. Parties everywhere (I'm told, we didn't get invited to any!). But celebrity sightings were common. Terry Bradshaw, Chris Rock, some other sports broadcasting dudes that J recognized.

Shopping in Scottsdale...awesome.

Restaurants-thank goodness we had reservations. We had a couple of great meals, all leading up to the very nutritious peanuts, popcorn and pretzels at the game.

Jordan Sparks singing the national anthem...the highlight of the day.

Tom Petty singing his old standards live...he even looked like he had his hair blown out. It wasn't sticking to the side of his head!

On the other hand:

Standing in line for 45 minutes just to get IN to shop for souvenirs that were cheap, overpriced, and picked over.

The first hotel we checked into-a $750/night "suite" that was about 200 square feet, with 7 foot ceilings, smelled bad, and had NO CLOSET WHATSOEVER. When we called to ask if there was a secret door to the closet, they brought us a luggage rack to hang our clothes on. (Needless to say, we left shortly thereafter).

Traffic.

No commercials (Normally a good thing, but not on Super Bowl Sunday).

VERY FEW instant replays. Hard to really know what's happening down on the field.

Traffic. Took us almost 2 hours to get out of the parking lot after the game.

Flying home-flights were backed up for hours due to all the celebrities' private planes at the airport.

The restaurants at my concourse ran out of food on Monday. I found this out after I drink a glass of wine at the bar. So I ordered another one. Not a good thing for me on an empty stomach. In the middle of the day.

So...in retrospect. We were very grateful to our hosts for letting us join them for a fun weekend. But we like watching from home. No traffic, tivo, commercials, and lots of analysis.

Super Bowl Shuffle!

Since we're super bowl bound, I was thinking about the first year that I really started watching super bowls. I was always a football fan...even had a sports broadcasting class at UT Knoxville, where a big grade came from doing a research paper on the Super Bowl in 1983, but in 1985, The Chicago Bears swept onto the scene with the best group of characters ever seen on one football team! William Perry (the fridge), Walter Peyton "sweetness" (rest in peace), Jim McMahon (and his ever changing headbands...so 80's)...and a little music video called "The Super Bowl Shuffle"

Wonder if this is where rap got started? Oh my God, those white boys are cute, but they can't dance or rap worth a crap!

I also wonder how the 1985 Bears would do against the 2007 Patriots? They beat them back then, but now? Perry was considered huge by NFL standards in 1985, now it seems like every team has a few big boys like that. They did have a good defense...could they stop Brady?

Phoenix Super Bowl Bound!!!

Yes, we have tickets to the Super Bowl! Although the Titans aren't there, and never really had a chance to be this year, the Patriots are (instead of the Colts-yeah, baby!), and J and I are so excited. I've been to one other Super Bowl...when the Titans played the Rams, and lost by inches. I don't know if I can really count that one, though. I had the flu, and dragged myself there, through the crowds and the smells to the absolute BACK row of the stadium, and never stood up for the entire first half (trying not to throw up). J looked at me in the 2nd quarter and said, "If you're going to have to leave, I want to leave at halftime so I can at least watch the last half on TV." So sadly, we left. I missed the halftime show. But THIS year, it's Tom Petty! I wonder if he's going to do any Traveling Wilbury stuff...

Anyway, J and J have been going back and forth, planning the hotel stay, the Nike party, maybe meeting Dick Butkus (I don't know how to spell it), bringing some special bottles of wine to drink, but we just realized we don't have dinner reservations anywhere. With the Super Bowl and some big PGA tournament all going on this weekend, we might have to eat at McDonalds... maybe popcorn and hot dogs at the game. Oh well. J's working on it. More to come.

Heart of the Game

We just had a basketball pizza/movie night for H's basketball team. It's a great bunch of girls. Mostly 7th graders, and 3 8th graders. They have a huge game on the road tomorrow against a team that is 17-0. We played them at the beginning of the season and only lost by 5, so they're anxious for another chance. We watched the documentary "Heart of the Game" which is an incredibly interesting movie about Bill Resler, a girl's high school coach in Seattle, and his team over a 7 year span. Very motivating. He picks a "theme" every season for the team. One year's it's wolves, other years it's a Tropical Storm, Piranhas, etc. Then they use words like kill, annihilate, etc...very aggressive, but it works! You can see the fire in these girl's eyes, and it's very contagious. Hopefully it will fire them up for tomorrow.

Dropping teenagers off at the movies...

Took H and a friend to the movies tonight. Actually, we dropped them off an hour before the movie started, because we had a fundraiser to go to for H's school. They were going to eat, shop, then go to the movie. Being the overprotective mom that I am, I have H call me when she leaves the theatre to walk to the mall, and when she leaves the mall to walk to the theatre. They were being picked up by our long time babysitter/friend (it's not cool to call her a babysitter when you're 14). H calls her after the movie, and she picks them up outside the theatre.

Well, J and I got out of our thing earlier than we expected, and it was around the time H was supposed to get picked up...so I called her cell. No answer. Hmmmm. I called babysitter's phone. No answer...so I called H again. TWELVE TIMES. No answer. By this time we are home, and it's 45 minutes after their movie got out so I'm trying not to panic. I called babysitter's home (she is married now, and her husband is watching their child) NO ANSWER. I'm trying harder not to panic. After calling H and babysitter a couple more times I finally break down and call friend's MOM to find out friend's cell number. So now her mom is aware that the girls are not accounted for.

Long story short...friend answers her phone, H apologizes profusely, forgot to turn her phone back on, babysitter took them to get ice cream and left HER phone in the car, and they're in line for ice cream.

My heart is just now calming down. What am I gonna do if they really get in trouble?