Driving with a Learner's Permit

I pulled up to the gym to pick H up from basketball. She had been up until midnight the night before, cramming for two tests that she had that day. Then, after school she had an hour workout with the D1 trainers, lifting weights and sprinting outside, then an hour with the "Dr. Dish" working on her shooting. She was red faced and looked absolutely exhausted.

"Can I drive home?" (She has her permit, and ALWAYS wants to drive home)

"You look so tired, why don't you just let me drive you."

"No, I promise, I'm fine."

So I got out and walked around to the passenger seat. The side that has no brake pedal, even though I stomp on it whenever she's driving. It drives her crazy. There's also no steering wheel. It's a problem when you're a control freak mom who is trying her hardest to let go a little bit. But nonetheless, I think she needs all the practice she can get, so she drives me around a lot.

Usually I can't help but coach her through the whole thing.

"Slow down!"
"Pull out a little bit more!"
"Look both ways."
"Don't turn so soon."
"Look out!!!!"

But she actually does fine. She's very conscientious, remembers all the rules of the road, and if anything, she's too careful.

So we make the 3 mile drive home. When we turned onto the road 1/2 a mile from our house, I looked down for a minute to check my email. I looked up a few seconds later, and as we went around a curve the car kept going straight.

"H...., H...., H...., WATCH OUT!!!"

And she swerved the car back onto the road, apologizing over and over again. She immediately pulled over and started crying.

"What just happened?"

"I DON'T KNOW", she sobbed.

We sat there for a few minutes while she calmed down.

"Did you fall asleep?"

"I DON'T KNOW", she said. "I don't think so. I just kind of zoned out."

So in my most gentle, motherly voice, I asked her what she thought could have happened if I hadn't been there.

"I could have hit a mailbox, or a telephone pole."

I said, "Or, what about a small child walking down the road?"

And with that, she became absolutely hysterical. We sat there for awhile, and I told her stories-including how I pulled over and took a nap once when I was driving home from UT, until she calmed down enough to tell me that she didn't want to drive the rest of the way home. We switched places, and drove home in silence.

The good news...She didn't hit anything (or anyone), and she still wanted to drive the next day.

And most important...I think she'll think twice about getting behind the wheel when she's tired.

When your iphone is in the bottom of the lake...

When you lean over to help dock the boat, and your iphone falls into the FREEZING cold lake, you know it's dead.  But it's too hard to just walk away, when you can see it sitting on the silty bottom, about six feet down.  So, you find a couple of oars, and make a game out of it!



Who cares if it never works again...that was fun!

Benefits of Friendship

This weekend was another one for the books. H had a three day weekend, so we scooted up to North Carolina to soak up the beauty, and to spend time with friends. H brought a girlfriend, and J and I invited a couple, who have been our friends for 20 years to join us. It's so much fun for us to share our little bit of paradise with friends. H and her friend started chatting from the moment we picked them up at school on Thursday, and didn't stop until we dropped her off at home on Sunday.

J came up with S early to play golf, and T and I came up on Thursday with the girls. We played cards, hiked, read, knitted, laughed, drank good wine, and had an incredible weekend. Didn't sleep much, but I feel energized whenever I spend good quality time with friends. I think J and I learned about the benefits of quality friendships from his mother.

My mother-in-law is the picture of health. She exercises every day, eats well, has an occasional martini or glass of wine, and when she wakes up every morning she takes about 20 vitamins/supplements with a glass of orange juice. People who meet her are drawn to her personality. She looks at least 15 years younger than she is, and has the energy level of someone younger than me!

And she also makes friends everywhere she goes. Her friends are found everywhere...of course, her peers, her family, the co-workers from her job, but also from less expected places. Her hairdresser, manicurist, housekeeper, alterations lady, shopkeeper...are all considered friends to her. She will strike up a conversation with a stranger and in the process of five minutes will already know their name, family situation, and whether they need a job referral, or even a date.

If you ask most people, they would say that her "healthy lifestyle", the exercise, diet, supplements, and moderation is what keep her young. But a 10 year Australian study shows that it's the other thing, the thing that comes as easy to her as breathing, her ability to form close friendships.

And her youthful figure? Of course, her exercise and diet are considered key factors in keeping her in great shape, but a recent shows that her circle of friends can also play a role in preventing obesity. In 2007, the New England Journal of Medicine published a study showing that the risk of obesity increased by 60% when your circle of friends gained weight also!

And that's not all, Harvard published research last year showing that social integration with friends, children and neighbors delayed memory loss by 60%!

I've always felt that time with my girlfriends gives me a boost of energy, and even though I don't get to spend as much time with them as I did before marriage and kids, I treasure the time we do get to spend together. It's great to see proof that it's both physically and spiritually rewarding!

I wonder if the benefits of friendship outweigh the late night, oreo cookie-eating, red-wine drinking, chat-fests?